Qazirgi tanda әiel zatynyng qoghamdaghy, qúlshylyqtaghy, otbasyndaghy sonymen birge bala tәriybesindegi beynesi barshamyzgha tanys. Qoghamdaghy san týrli mamandyq iyesi atanyp, týrli salada qyzmet atqaryp jýrgen әiel adamdaryn kóremiz. «Áyelderding erkekterden artyqshylyghy Alla olardy sezimtal etip jaratqan (Erkekterge qaraghanda 99 ese sezimtal keledi). Degenmen Alla olardy úyalshaq qylap jaratqan» (Abu Hurayradan Bayhaqy riuayat etken). Áyel zatynyng tabighy sezimtaldyghy ruhaniyatqa bir taban jaqyn túrghandyghynyng nәtiyjesinde, asyl dinimiz Islam dinindegi qúlshylyqqa berilgen taqua әielder beynesi kóptep kezdesedi.

Alla elshisi, oghan Allanyng salauaty men sәlemi bolsyn, dindi nasihattap bastaghanda, әielder qauymy kóp qoldau kórsetken. Aytalyq, Hadisha anamyzdyng Islam dinin alghash qabyldap, býkil baylyghyn din jolynda júmsaghandyghy mәlim. Úhud soghysynda basqa әieldermen birge jaralylardy emdeumen ainalysqan, soghys kýni payghambardyng qasynan ketip qalghandargha renjip «Úrshyqty alyp, jip iyirinder. Qylyshyndy maghan ber, men soghysayyn» dep aiyptaghan әiel zattarynyng esimin kýlli músylman balasy biledi. Osy tústa Islam dinining әielder qauymyna әielge tәn minez-qúlqy, qasiyetteri, qúqyqtary men mindetteri bar derbes túlghalar retinde qarastyratyndyghyn kóremiz. Nәzik jaratylghan әiel adamynyng dinge qatynasyn alyp qaraytyn bolsaq, barlyq dindegi әielder men erlerding Jaratushy aldyndaghy mindetteri men qúlshylyqtary birdey sanalghanday Islam dinindegi әielding mindeti erlerding mindetimen birdey. Qúlshylyqtyng jekelegen bólikterinde erler men әielder arasynda aiyrmashylyghy bolghanymen, qúlshylyq tútastay alghanda barshagha ortaq. Islam dini әiel adamynyng psihologiyalyq jәne fiziologiyalyq mýmkindikterin paydalanyp, óz-ózin dúrys baghytta iske asyrugha tosqauyl qoymaydy. Aysha anamyz, oghan Alla razy bolsyn, riuayat etken hadisting birinde «Eng jaqsy әielder, ansarlardyng әielderi. Sebebi olar úyalshaqtar. Degenmen olardyng úyalshaqtyqtary, din ilimderin ýirenulerine kedergi bolmady». Rasynda, qazirgi tanda qoghamnyng barlyq salasynda bilim alyp, qyzmet jasap jýrgen әpke-sinlilerimiz, aq jaulyqty analarymyz bar.

Islam dini boyynsha әielding qoghamdyq orny aiqyn. Payghambarymyz manyzdy jәne sheshushi kezenderde әielderding pikirimen sanasqandyghy, olar sayasi, әleumettik, mәdeny jәne ekonomikalyq mәselelerge atsalysty. Asyl dinimiz әielding júmys jasap, óz qabiletterin tanytugha kedergi jasaugha, әielderding qoghamdyq jәne mәdeny әreketterden tysqary qaldyrudy qoldamaydy.

Aysha anamyzdan, oghan Alla razy bolsyn, Ahmad riuayat etken hadiysinde: «Áyel – er kisining ekinshi jartysy», - dep әiel adamnyng otbasyndaghy mәrtebesin jan joldasy jarynyng ekinshi jartysy ekendigin aiqyndap túr. «Olar senderge kiyim, sender de olargha kiyimsinder (ispetti)» (Baqara, 187) degen ayattar әiel men erkekting bir-birine teng jәne bir-birin tolyqtyratyn jandar ekenin kórsetedi. Áyelderding qúqyqtary men mindetterining basym bóligi olardyng ana jәne jar retindegi otbasyndaghy roline kóbirek qatysty bolyp keledi.

«Baqytty daladan izdeme, baladan izde» dep dana halqymyz tekke aitpaghan. Bala tәrbiyesindegi әiel adamnyng beynesi salmaqty, salihaly. Óitkeni hadisterde aitylghanday «Ayaghy auyr bolyp, qúrsaq kóterip jýrgen әiel dýnie salsa, shahitterding qatarynan bolady» (hadisti Ubada ibn Samitten Ibn Saat riuayat etken).

Taghy bir hadiste bir kýni Allanyng elshisine, oghan Allanyng salauaty men sәlemi bolsyn, bir әiel balasymen keledi, sonda Payghambar, oghan Allanyng salauaty men sәlemi bolsyn, bylay dedi: «Ayaghy auyr әielder, dýniyege bala әkelip әri balalargha qamqor, kýieuine adal, aitqanyn eki etpeytin bolsa, namazyn óz uaqytynda oqysa, barar jeri jәnnat bolady» (Abu Amamadan Ahmad, Ibn Maja jәne Bayhaqy riuayat etken).

Býgingi bala ertengi boyjetken, keleshek ana, ayauly jar. Qyz ósirip otyrghan әrbir ata-ananyng paryzy – perzentin imandylyqqa tәrbiyeleu, adamgershilikke baulu bolyp tabylady. Elbasy N. Nazarbaev «Qazaqstan-2050» Strategiyasy: qalyptasqan memleketting jana sayasy baghyty» atty Joldauynda әielder qauymyna qatysty erekshe toqtalyp ótti: «Qymbatty hanymdar! Sizder – otbasynyn, demek memleketting tiregisizder. Elimizding bolashaqta qanday bolatyny balalarymyzdyng boyyna ózimiz qanday tәrbiyeni siniretinimizge tikeley baylanysty. Eng aldymen, biz qyzdarymyzdyng tәrbiyesine kóp kónil bóluimiz kerek. Olar – bolashaq jar, bolashaq ana, shanyraqtyng shyraqshylary» deydi. «Dýniyege qyz kelgen uaqytta, Alla Taghala ol jerge perishtelerdi jiberip, sәlemin aityp: «Myna ýiding túrghyndary, senderge sәlem bolsyn»,-deydi. Perishteler qanattarymen jana tuylghan qyzdy qorghashtap bylay deydi: «qanday әlsiz, qorghansyz edi, әlsiz deneden shyqty. Eger әkesi ony tәrbiyelep ósirse, qiyametke deyin oghan Allanyng jәrdemi bolady» (Nabit bin Shurayttan Tabarany riuayat etken).

Osy orayda «Perzentin imandylyqqa ana sýtimen siniru ýshin besikti Alla atymen terbetken qazaq analary aq jaulyqtyn, ar-namystyng aq tuy. Besik jyrynda «әldi» degen sóz «Alla» degen sózding ózgergen týri ekenin til mamandary әldeqashan dәleldegen.

Bizding әjelerimiz:

Alla degen ar bolmas,

Allanyng joly tar bolmas.

Allany aitqan adamdar

Aqyrette qor bolmas, - dep besik terbetse,

Bóbegim mening bal bópem,

Tәnirim bolsyn jar bópem

Imandy bop óssin dep

Illalla dep terbetem, - degen besik jyryn da qazaq әieli shygharghan.

Qazaq halqynyng imany qúndylyqtarymen kómkerilgen qansha maqal-mәtelin, anyz-әpsanasyn, jyr-dastanyn, ertegisin, sheshendik sózin, danalyq naqylyn, túrmys-salt ólenderin әielder shygharghanyn tap basyp aitu qiyn. Biraq әldiyden eposqa deyingi ruhany múralarda qazaq әielining últtyq bolmysy, últtyq sanasy, últtyq psihologiyasy sayrap túrghany anyq. Asyl dinimizge negizdelgen ruhany qúndylyqtar tek sózben ghana berilmeydi. Ol adamnyng bolmysy, beynesi, óz túlghasy arqyly qalyptasady, ózgelerge beriledi. Tәrbie degenimiz – óz bolmysynmen ýlgi bolu. Osyny myqtap eskerip, jaqsy týsingen qazaq әieli ruhany qúndylyqtardy óz boyyna jinaqtau arqyly ózgelerge ýlgi bola aldy.

Taraz qalasyndaghy memlekettik múrajayda qazaq әielining bolmys-beynesi jayynda izdenis nәtiyjesinde, últymyzdyng salt-dәstýri men islam dinin toghysqan túsyn әiel adamdarynyng 1931-1970 jyl aralyghyndaghy surettegi aq jaulyqtarynan bayqaymyz. Áriyne qazaq әiel balasy jiyrmasynshy ghasyrgha deyin de jaulyqsyz jýrmegen. Sharighat zandylyqtary kóp jaghdayda últymyzdyng tektilikke negizdelgen bolmysynda birin-biri tolyqtyryp túrady. Hadiste «Árbir dinning minezi bar. Islam dinining minezi – úyat» deydi. Úyat qazaq әielderining boyynda jaratylysynan bar qasiyet. Qazaq halqy qyzdarynyng dene bitimi qalyptasa bastaghanda, yaghny balighat jasqa tolghanda úzyn jen, etegi tobyqqa deyin, dene bitimine sәikes jarasymdy etip, jelbirshiktermen  qos etek kóilekti  keng etip tigip kiygizgen. Kóilekting syrtynan kiyetin ynghayly әrtýrli syrt kiyimderine oiy-órnekter salyp, әshekey búiymdar taqqandyghyn arhivtegi kóne suretterden kóruimizge bolady.

Osy rette, batyr babamyz B.Momyshúlynyng kelini Z.Ahmetova apamyzdyng «Babalar amanaty» atty kitabyndaghy qazaq әielining beynesin bylaysha sipattaydy: «Qazaqtyng arulary kelin bolyp týskende sәndi de mәndi sәukele kiyedi. Bir jyl jas kelin retinde sharshy oramal tartady. Jyl tolghanda apa-әjeler, abysyn-ajyn arnayy dastarhan jasap, kelinge kiymeshek kiygizu rәsimin jasaydy. Qazaq әielining ómirindegi búl da ónegeli dәstýr, atauly kýn sanalghan. Ájeler: «Mine, endi naghyz kiymeshekti kelinshek boldyn. Kiymesheging qútty bolsyn! Ómiring ozghaq, kiyiming tozghaq bolsyn!» - dep, tilek aityp, bayghazy úsynypty», - dep әiel adamnyng kórki sanalatyn shashtaryn kelinshekterding ana atanghannan keyin kiymeshekpen qorghap, aq jaulyqtyng as-auqatpen bala tәrbiyesindegi manyzdylyghyn eskergen.

Sonymen qatar, «Babalar amanatynda» «Kiymeshekting ýsh jýz rularyna tәn ózindik aluan týrli ýlgileri bar. Jas erekshelikterine qaray órnek-naqyshtary da ózgesheleu tigiledi. Kelinshektikin kýmis shettik pen marjandy kezektestirip tize tigip, jaghyn zermen nemese jibek jippen kesteleydi. Ataq-dәrejesi biyik әri bay adamdardyng kelinderining kiymeshegine altyn, meruert, laghyl tastar da qosylady. Al jasy egde әielderding kiymeshekterine órnegi sypayy, jasyna layyq bolady. Kelinshekter kiymeshek syrtynan shashaqty bórtpe shәli, jibek oramal salady, ýlken apalar men әjeler qarqaraday etip, kýndik oraydy. Búl – toy-tomalaqta, Ramazan ait, Qúrban aitta, Úlystyng úly kýni – Nauryzda qonaqqa bararda kiyetin birkiyerler. Kýndelikti ot basynda ynghayly, әri qarapayym etip tigilgen kiymeshekter kiygen. Mine, osynday kiymeshek kiygen qazaq әielderining ne manday shashy, ne samay shashy kórinbeydi, әri alqym-moyyn, keudesi týgel jabyq bolghan. Kóship-qonyp jýretin tirshiligine qaramay, qazaq әielderinde qazirge zamanda jii kezdesetin tós, býirek, qúlaq aurulary siyrek bolypty. Kiymeshekting aldy keudeni kindikke deyin jauyp túrsa, arty býirek pen beldi týgel jauyp, ýshbúryshtanyp etekke qaray týsedi. Bayqap otyrsyzdar, qazaq әielderi әri jabyq, әri әsem baskiyim kiygen. Esh uaqytta ashyq-shashyq jýrmegen eken. «Esti qyz etegin qymtap jýredi». Kóilek degen әielding sәni edi ghoy. Kóilek kiygenderding kóp jeri jabyq bolghandyqtan beysauat kóz súqtanbaydy. Kóilektiler etek-jenin rettep, qymtana jýredi. Qadam basu jýrisi  soghan sәikes sypayy, ayaq-qolyn qalay bolsa, solay qozghamaydy. Kóilek әieldi artyq qozghalystan tejep, birqalypty ústaydy. Tipti, denesindegi kem-ketik jeri eleusiz qalady. Al, shalbar kiygenderding kóbi oran-sorang bútyn kerip, jýre beredi. Qymsynbay, kez kelgen ortada ayaqty erlershe aiqastyryp ta, eki ayaqty alshaq qoyyp, taqymyn kórsetip te, otyra beredi. Bayqamay, kóp azdan kólemdi kóp jinala erkek minezdes, erkek pishindes, erkek jýristi әielder kóbeydi», - dep qazaq әielining beynesin anyq ashyqtap bergen. Kiymeshek – qasiyetti bas kiyim. Kiymeshekti jas kelin balaly bolghanda kiyedi. Bala emizgen kezde omyrauyn kólegeylep, kóz tiiden, shang tozannan, kýnnen, jelden qorghaydy, әri jas sәbiyding jaulyqsyz anasynyng shashynan shoshymauyna sebep bolghan. Áyelding qúlshylyqtaghy, qoghamdaghy, otbasy bala tәrbiyesindegi beynesi osynday bolghan.

Babalarmen keler úrpaqty jalghastyryp túratyn altyn kópir – salt-dәstýrge say, sharighat shenberindegi  shәlisimen qazaq әieli qys qystau, jaz jaylaugha at jalyny, týie qomynda jaugershilik zamanynda kóship-qonyp jýrip, ar-namysyn saqtaghan. Aq jaulyqtaryna daq týsirmey ústaghan analarymyz, úlanghayyr qazaq dalasynda sәn-saltanatymen jýrgen qyz-kelinshekterge kóp ýlgi.

Hazireti Ali: «Qyz-jaqsylyq, úl-nyghmet» jaqsylyqtyng sauaby bar, nyghmetting súrauy bar», - dep aitqan. Endeshe sauap-jauapsyz qalmaydy. Qyzdy jaqsylyqqa balaghan músylman júrty qyz balanyng tәrbiyesine, qoghamdaghy ornyna erekshe mәn bergen. Sauaptyng jauaby retinde keng baytaq qazaq dalasynan tughan talay batyr túlghaly azamattar men abyzdar aq jaulyqty analardan tughan.

Ózgeni «beske» biluge tyrysqansha, ózindi «ýshtikke» biluge kýsh salsan, oljaly bolghanyn», - dep Bauyrjan Momyshúly, aitqanday ózimizge ýnilip, tarihymyzdy tereng boylyp, analarmyz salghan sara joldan taghylym alsaq adaspaytynymyz aiqyn. «Jynghyl da óz jerinde kórikti» qazaq dalasyndaghy әiel adamynyng beynesin, asyl dinimiz Islam dinining aiqyn kórinisin, aty anyzgha ainalghan, talay batyrgha qalqan bolghan. Qazaq qyzdarynyng ishinde Qabanbaydyng jary batyr Gauhardan bastap, Gauhar men Qabanbaydan tughan Nazymnen batyr, Qyzqúrtqa, Bopay, keshegi ótken Domalaq, Qarqabat, Abaq, Shashty, Úlpan, Úljan men Zere, Aliya men Mәnshýk jәne aty atalmaghan, tarihta zerttep-zerdelenbegen talay analardy mysalgha keltirsek bolady. Olar «Últjandy» edi. «Otandy sýy – imannan ekeni» jaratylysynan júpar shashyp túrdy. Osy maqalanyng kórkin keltirip, ghylymy túrghydan naqty tarihy mәlimetter keltire ketuim ýshin ózimizding túrghylyqty qalamyz qasiyetti «Áulie ata» shaharyndaghy memlekettik arhivke baryp, qazaq әielderining bolmys-beynesine qatysty mәlimetter izdedim. Nәtiyjesinde, qazaq әiel zatynyng diyirmen tartyp otyrghan túsynda, qolyna kekpen alyp jerdi jyrtqan túsynda, tipti qorym-qorym shópti jinau barysynda, siyr sauyp, úsaq maldyng jýnin qyrqyp otyrghan qazaq әielderining jaulyqsyz suretin kórmedim. 1931-1970 jyldar aralyghyndaghy qoghamnyng barlyq salasyndaghy, әsirese bala tәrbiyesindegi balabaqshadaghy tәriybeshining beynesi oramalsyz emes. 1942 jyly shamamen jasy qyryqtaghy maydangha biday ótkizuge bara jatqan arbadaghy kiymeshekti әiel zatynyng suretin kóruimizge bolady.

Ghasyrlar synynan ótip súryptalyp jetken shynayy adamgershilik pen imangha negizdelgen últtyq qúndylyqtar qúnyn joymaydy, óitkeni negizi asyl, týbi tereng túnghiyq ilimmen bilimge negizdelgen Islam dininen bastau alady. Áyeldi erekshe qadirleytin islam dini onyng jan-jaqty jetilip, damyghanyn qalaydy. Islam dini jalpy adam qúqyghyna, onyng ishinde әiel adamnyng qúqyghyna airyqsha mәn berip, onyng ar-namysyn qorghap, onyng qoghamda layyqty oryngha ie boluyn qamtamasyz etedi.

Qoryta aitqanda, Islam dini әielge Allanyng amanaty retinde qaraugha shaqyrady.

Lәzzat Myrzashova

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